After so long….

– The Beginning –

Trains of thoughts patronizing my inward personality, have caused a vast upheaval in my emotions. Musing over the past Christmas till date, I noted the lists of things achieved, abandoned, and even those that I keep temporizing thus far. How amazing it is for humans to state out their goals deftly and swiftly, but takes great multitudes of determination, studious, and effort to accomplish those.

The list of objectives I have jotted down ends with a shorter footnote. This can be seen as lesser strife for a new year, or the one which applies to me more would be, the year which I find more contentment in. Undoubtedly, it seems as though having more goals to achieve is parallel of looking forward to conclude each. However, it also reflects on how much I am willing to put forth my effort in.

It’s the third quarter of the year 2009. Indeed, the inconsistent habit of scribbling my wants on the offering envelop did make it come to realization. I passed my driving with as little as 4 demerit points!! I am glad that my family, all the ninis, and Miah, are happy and excited for me. =D Thank God for blessing me with awesome friends and family.

Have been reading a book by Apellos Poh, he is an influential writer indeed. In his book, he mentioned about many life changing attitudes. Live a balanced life, and not life on a balance. Such a balance is absolutely subjective to individual. What is balance and sufficient for one may not be the same for another. But many times, many people would often place their judgment on others, just because they behave differently, or have a different commitment level. Expectations deficiency I would say. The problem that people often notices is the personality itself and not concluding if it’s really due to external forces. For instance, one who did not commit as much in this work and project, they would deem the person putting in little effort or being a free loader and lazy. But in actual fact, it could be due to personal reasons. Or… Unable to make it for things or being late or refusing a request will be concluded that it’s their personality. I do not want to point out names, but I do pray that such judgmental annotation would be voided out.

Unequal amount but EQUAL SACRIFICES is what I adhere. The bible says, what you have sowed on earth will be bound and revealed on Heaven. Hence, I seek not to place “facts” on someone. Gain much, lose some. The biggest loser is one who losest his soul.

If mutual understanding is the key to all successful relationship, why does it seem so difficult to comprehend the situation? I was crying out to God one day.  He blessed me with this relationship, but why didn’t he allow us to have a day together? Whether it’s an adult couple, young adult courthip, or family, a day together is essential to keep the relationship healthy. And “finding a balance” is what I got. Truly, I can’t strike a balance if such advantage is ripped off me. Things could be made flexible, but how ironic others see it as a one way street. If a dad has to work extra shift, he would make it up on weekend, or take a day off only if the family is free on weekdays. Scenarios go on. I am tired. But I am glad family and friends are there for me. And God as well. If things are going to be stagnant, I can only seek a new door for a less tormenting route.

On a lighter note, I want to drive my friends and family around one day. =D And this paragraph is dedicated to Yanni, =>

First Impression of her: Introvert, shy, looks like a rabbit.

As time progresses: Friendly, can be lazy, and loves to wear polo tee

More: Glad to see her in the Kingdom of God. Being with her ( as friends!) can be lame, but it is often funny.  Seek to know her more. =D

– The end of my post –

GOD IS AWESOME AND I LOVE HIM.